Movies NOT to see before you die

Posted on January 19, 2009. Filed under: Movies to miss | Tags: , , |

As promised, I also want to cut through the fluff written by some critics about some movies which really have no merit whatsoever. I’m a firm believer that this is emperor’s new clothes-ism: no one wants to admit that they don’t see the wonder. Except me.

The first of my rants has to be aimed squarely at Lost In Translation. Quite possibly the most boring thing I’ve ever sat through, and I’ve been to biochemistry lectures!

Look at them. Even they’re bored and they’re being paid to be there! Essentially Lost in Translation is a film about nothing. Some misguided friends of mine have tried to argue that its an acurate depiction of real life, where nothing dramatic happens that often. This is true, but I wouldn’t pay to watch Bill Murray act that out. We have films of real life, its called reality TV and we all know that’s not going to win any Oscars.

My point is, films can be realistic without being tedious, but this film seems to delight in going for hours without any plot at all. I’m sure that even the most boring of “real” people don’t spend hours staring into space, but apparently if you’re working for Sofia Coppola that’s exactly what they do.

Billed ironically as a comedy, I’m yet to find the funny part. Even Bill Murray, who is usually so right gets it so wrong, with his next flop The Life Aquatic seeming to suggest that he’s just stopped caring.

The biggest problem with Lost in Translation however, is how self aware it is. This film came with an Oscar checklist and Coppola made sure every box was ticked. Unfortunately she forgot to add a plot.

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11 Responses to “Movies NOT to see before you die”

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Oh please! LiT is a great film, very sad and very funny. Not a lot happens but that’s what draws your attention away from the dialogue and into the cinematography. There are some beautiful shots in that film.

No! It just isnt! I gave it a far try but I was so disappointed. I will give you that the cinematography is good, but I wanted a movie not a painting.

Ah, so we have a deeper question of what film is for then…

Indeed. beautiful cinematography is one thing, but it should have something to accompany. You can have a subtle plot, artful shooting and a compellig story; I give you: Brokeback Mountain.

I agree about Lost In Translation. It was excrutiatingly boring. Nothing about it interested me.

Katie – I guess we’ll have to agree to disagree here. I loved LiT — and not just for the cinematography — but for the “story” — I enjoyed the conceit of watching two overly-priviledged people become lost, lonely, and bored in a city as frightfully alive and full of interesting things to do as Tokyo. I thought as a character piece exposing this type of bored Bourgeois personality abroad — it was near brilliant. The fact that they didn’t have any fun until they found each other — well, we’ll chalk that up to romance I suppose — two borderline rotten people perfect for each other. I like how Copolla didn’t try to make them likable…she let the performances take care of that…and whether you found them likable or not or found any interest in their story….well, I’m willing to concede that could be a matter of taste. But to say LiT has no story or is about nothing is ridiculous….to say you didn’t like the story or found the story boring…well, that’s fair game.

LMAO — they do look really bored there in that picture, btw…don’t they?! I get the feeling you might’ve had a similar look on your face watching this.

Yeah that was my face. But then it got progressively angrier.

Sorry? You loved it for the story? What story? What was that film actually about?
Did they have fun when they found eachother? My memory is that they barely spoke to eachother, and when they did it was along the lines of “I’m bored.” “Me too.”

With most of the films like this where I get into arguments I agree to watch them again as I’m a firm believer that with most films you can’t really make a decision until you’ve seen it twice. But the thought of putting myself through that tedium again….Zzzzzzzzzz

Funny? Ha, this movie is about as funny as “Schindler’s List.”

So true. I’d rather watch paint dry. There’s more chance of something interesting happening. (ooh look, a drip!)

Ugh…I’ve tried watching this film twice, but I always stop halfway through. It’s tedious and drags on. Just not my taste.

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